ARE WE LOVED OR WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Flowers and goodies from all of our neighbors and friends. We love you all so much!

Just received these flowers from my BFF Jayme and her mom Ellen. Thank you so much I love you both!

Can I just say Jon and I feel like the most loved people on earth right now! A guy came to the door yesterday with a bouquet of flowers from my aunt and all my cousins. I had already been crying and when I answered the door I just started to cry even harder. The poor kid didn't know what to say but told me to have a good day. I thought there it not one good thing about today! But look at all this good from all of our friends and family. I can't believe how many comments, e-mails, and phone calls we have received. It has been overwhelming to feel the love and concern you all have for us. I think some times we hesitate to be open about things we might be going through. It is hard to show weakness but I am so glad that I decided to let you all into our lives and see us how we really are. Life is full of trials for all of us and if we could just realize how much we can do for one another if we will just open up. I really and truly can not tell you how much it has helped to have your love and prayers. If I hadn't opened up I would be sitting here in my misery wondering........doesn't any one care? But instead I feel this outpouring of love and sympathy from so many people. Even some old high school friends who found my blog. 11 years ago all I could think about is graduating and moving on with life. Never did I imagine I would face such difficult trials. But you grow up and realize that life is more than just about you and you make sacrifices. Jon and I will do what it takes to bring another baby into our family. We don't know what this all means for us yet but we will figure out the reason for our failed IVF. We are just going to take some time away from baby and focus on the two miracles we already have.

I thought the tears would stop but some how they just keep on flowing. I had high hopes I would get up and put some make-up on but its raining and I can't stop crying so what the point. We will move on but for right now I think I need a little time to like my friend Missy said "let my heart ache". Jon and I are so sad but feel the love of our Savior and realize all of his suffering. This life was not meant to be easy. I want to share a quote that my cousin Summer put on her blog after loosing a twin at 8 weeks Preg.

“Things don't go wrong and break your heart so you can become bitter and give up. They happen to break you down and build you up so you can be all that you were intended to be.”


I read this over and over because it hits home with me. I know that we will be stronger because of this. Last night Jon and I were looking at the picture of our embryos and talking about how much hope we had that they would take. I mentioned how sad it was that they never took and he said "yes but they made us stronger"! I will hold on to that knowledge for the rest of my life. And take with me what they have given me..... a new understanding of how much my Heavenly Father Loves me.

Thanks again for all your love, we couldn't get through this with out all of you!!!! This will be my last post about our IVF. We have come so far from our first post. I want to start moving on and blog about my sweet family. Enough about me I want to focus on others for a while! My boys are so much fun right now and are doing lots of great things. So no more sad and depressing posts I promise. Love You all so much!